An Open Letter to Tom Cruise

I thought I would share with you all my little open letter to Tom Cruise.

Dear Mr. Cruise,

I like you. You seem like a nice enough guy. Also, you’re a fine actor. (Just to clarify, I’m talking about Born on the Fourth of July and Magnolia not, say, some of your more recent flicks like The Last Samurai and Mission Impossible II.)

So, I hope you’ll heed my request:

Kindly stop trying to fool the public into thinking you have a romance with twentysomething Katie Holmes.

Stop gushing about your love on Oprah.

Stop staging corny “We’re So Into Each Other” photos for the press.

Mr Cruise, I am so on to you.

Trust me. You’re big box office. Spielberg-directed War of the Worlds will make a crap-load of money. You don’t need to stage some elaborate romantic charade to get media coverage. You’re Tom Cruise, for God’s sake!

I only allowed myself to follow your last romance with Penelope Cruz because I thought it would be fun if you got married and she hyphenated: Penelope Cruz-Cruise. Hee!

In any case, stop the insanity. Date who you want, not who your publicist tells you to. Or lay around at home counting your money. Your call.

Very truly yours,
TJ

(Photo Credit: Marco Iacobucci / EPA via Sipa Press)

Comments

[Sarah]

Uhm, he is soooo gay.

[Christina]

It is such a FARCE!

And, yes, I think he's gay, too.

; )

[Kid Various]

Does Scientology allow one to be gay? Isn't that an abomination against the space aliens or something?

[Brother Kojak]

I feel you, Twisty. So what if he likes to date 300 lb Asian women who only speak Cantonese? Its his call, right? Now, I don't know if that's the case for sure or not, but he must have some weird chic fetish because all of his romantic interests have been of the same mold: up-and-coming actresses. Hmmmmmm....

[Jim - PRS]

How'd ya like to have that nose full of nickles?

[Lizzie]

That's exactly what my husband's been saying about Tom for years, now. I still can't figure the guy out...nor do I want to after his silly remarks about Brooke Shields and post-partum depression.

[judi]

For someone who "never worries" about what others think of him (and I would assume he feels everyone should be this way), Tom for some reason thinks the world gives a rats ass what his opinons on anti-depressants (they're NOT anti-psychotics, Tom- apparently you are not THAT educated on this afterall)and Ritalin are! Tom, Tom, Tom... rather presumptuous of you to try and force your opinions down the throats of Americans isn't it? Rather arrogant too Tom, since you seem to feel those who do not agree with you are being fools, duped by the medical community. Afterall Tom, you've studied the "history of psychiatry"! What a freak and a jerk you are Tom. Some might say that someone so rigid in their thinking Tom, so unwilling to entertain the ideas of others Tom, some might say you're brainwashed Tom. Furthermore Tom, some might say a 40-something year old man who has a history of flitting from one kookie (excluding you of course Nicole)relationship to the next and now working on his 3rd marriage had "issues" Tom. When you were doing all that studying of psychiatry Tom did any of that stuff make you go "hmmmm" at all? Any alarm bells go off?
Hey Tom... do us all a favor will you Tom? Stick to making movies and keep your half-baked, unfounded and arrogant opinions to yourself. No one really cares Tom. Gosh Tom, I hope when Katie has a baby (and suffers from postpartum depression)that those "vitamins" work. Maybe she'll leave the kid alone Tom and just drown YOU Tom in the tub Tom !